"Harry Potter. The end is near."
"Cut!"
"Come on, dude! What now?"
"Aside from it being ridiculous, isn't that the tagline? You wanna get sued?"
"You think that's gonna get us sued?" Gary is making that face - that "you're so stupid it appalls me" face.
Mike, resists his urge to slap it. "We are breaking a major story here. Try to be a professional."
"It's called color, man. News writing 101. But hey," Gary's palms wave in mock retreat, "if you think you can do a better job you're more than welcome to step out from behind the camera."
"Yeah sure, you should be able to operate this thing no problem. It doesn't take any skill or anything."
"Exactly, man." Gary nods. "You do your job and I'll do mine."
"Action!" Mike chuckles when the aim marks appear, targeting Gary's face. It never gets old.
"Things are getting a bit, ahem, hairy, for some of the 'Harry Potter' cast. We've got exclusive footage of some pretty steamy -"
"Cut!" Mike is agitated now. "I'm sorry, I just can't deal with the 'hairy' thing. It's just not funny, dude."
"That's it! I've had it!" Gary's shrill voice causes the microphone to squeal in agony. He storms toward the door.
"Where are you going?" Mike is struck with sincere panic. They've got to break this story. "Are you serious? Dude, we'll be famous. We'll be guaranteed jobs."
"I'm taking five - getting a coke." Gary doesn't look back, but his palm is raised a la The Supremes.
Mike paces the room, nibbling on his thumbnail. Thirty seven takes. "What's with this guy?" He checks the time on his phone and realizes he's not going to catch the bus. He dials his little sister, sadly the only female whose number he knows by heart. She got dibs on Mom's Corolla when it was "time to get something a little more fun," and, in turn, indentured servitude to Mike's transportation needs. Fair is fair, after all.
"Maria!"
"Whassup bro?" Mike hated the influence all the hip-hop was having on Maria's diction.
Choose your battles. "Hey, I need you to pick me up at the studio in about an hour."
"No dice my brotha. I have a date."
"A date?" Who was this girl? What happened to Maria, his brace faced, pajama clad, popcorn hoarding, videot of a sister?
"Well, you'll have to bring your date to get me then. I'm stuck. Come on."
"Hold on I have a beep." Before Mike has a chance to respond Maria has already clicked over to the other caller. Where the hell is Gary he wonders, looking upward at nothing in particular.
"-ike!" Maria is frantic. "Ohmygod!There'saHarryPottersextapeonyoutube.Ihavetogowatchiti'llcallyouback!"
Click. Mike stands perfectly still, the phone still raised to his ear, his jaw hanging open. The dial tone hums in his ear. Still, he cannot move.
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